Google Ads Strategy to Get Higher Lead Quality

[00:00:00] Jenny: Hello, and thanks for tuning into the stroke and podcast. Jenny Townsend, your host. I am here with David Buck. I'm super excited to speak with him today. He is going to be sharing a wealth of knowledge. Literally. We were just covering over the show notes and he has so many tips and tools to help you.

[00:00:17] Jenny: David has been doing business development for over 35 years. He has Developed a strong awareness of what it took for people to be productive and efficient, not just busy. My gosh, I keep saying that to my team members. They're like, we're so busy. I'm like, you're just not working smart. Um, anyway, so he's going to be talking about, um, having a successful career and the ability to pursue a meaningful personal life as well.

[00:00:42] Jenny: Uh, he is a coach, his. Business is infinity lifestyle design. He has a program for us. He just released his first book in April. So he's going to be talking a little bit about that. Time management, David, thanks so much for being with me today. I'm super excited to learn from you.

[00:00:58] David: Jenny, what an honor to be here. I appreciate you letting me be on the show.

[00:01:02] Jenny: Yeah. So I feel like this episode is going to be really great for personal and professional development. As I said earlier, a lot of it has to do with time management and Sometimes it's just really easy for us to do the really easy tasks. We feel we have a level of success, but doesn't necessarily mean that we're like meeting our goals, working towards the goals.

[00:01:22] Jenny: And I know a lot of my team members struggle with that. So I really am looking forward to our conversation before we get kicked off though, tell our audience a little bit more about you, like if you're married, divorced, where you live, do you have kids, just have dogs, cats. Tell us a little bit more about you personally.

[00:01:36] David: Well, for me, we, uh, in Ponte Vedra, Florida, which is just south of Jacksonville, Florida, the Northern part of the state, been married over three decades to my amazing wife, the Reverend Dr. Susan Rose, and we have. Two cats and a dog and they drive us crazy, but they're also great. Um, and I am about to be, my daughter in law is past her due date and we are waiting any day for the call for us to tell us that we are first time grandparents.

[00:02:11] David: So we are thrilled and excited about that opportunity and looking forward to go seeing them later this month.

[00:02:18] Jenny: Oh my gosh, that's so awesome. Okay. Well, if you get the call and you have to go, we can always pause the podcast and come back and record. Cause that's a super exciting time. I know my mom's a grandmother and she just absolutely loves it. Um, my husband and I, we don't have children. We love our time. We love traveling.

[00:02:34] Jenny: We love wide. And we really did not want to fund a college fund. So, um, we opted not to have children. Um, but I hear the grandparents life is a great life. So congratulations to you. So, okay, perfect. So let's get started. Um, before we kick off, I want you to tell us a little bit about your book, um, the title of it and what it is about.

[00:02:57] Jenny: Um, so that way everyone can kind of get a sense of like what our conversations are going to be about today.

[00:03:01] David: Sure. So my book is called the time optimized life and the actual, the outline from it came about with as a, from an assessment tool that I use with clients as we talk and work with them about improving their time. One of the things that I found about people is they're very reactive. To how they use their time.

[00:03:23] David: And that's where I call time management. I'm not a fan of that phrase only from the standpoint is most people adopt a last in first out attitude, whatever comes at them, they feel like they have to do and they may do it well, but then what happens is they still have all the other stuff they have to complete during the day.

[00:03:42] David: So the time optimized life is about flipping. That script. And instead of being reactive, there are ways in which you can begin to be proactive where you plan your time out, anticipate maybe what will come up with the goal of knowing you're never going to be perfect, but it puts you in a position to then step back a little bit and evaluate before you decide to use your valuable time, whether.

[00:04:10] David: Something that comes up late or someone else wants you to use your time to help them.

[00:04:17] Jenny: I'm going to order five of these books and give them to my leadership team.

[00:04:20] David: Thank, thank you.

[00:04:22] Jenny: So is it better to get their books on your website or on Amazon?

[00:04:26] David: So go to Amazon or any other place. So, uh, they're for sale on Amazon and also Barnes and Noble, Target, Walmart, all of the places you can buy them online. So just whatever's your. Flavor of choice, pick it.

[00:04:40] Jenny: I love it. I think so many times our teams get so inundated with tasks and emails and they just get stuck in that as well. I was just actually at the CEO, uh, forum this morning and this one guy, he said that his mentor insisted his assistant open all of his emails and he eliminate open emails because he says, What ends up happening is you end up dealing with other people's problems and you can't actually get to the things that you need to do to move the needle, hit the goals, keep the company moving forward because you're so stuck in the office, answering emails and all that good stuff.

[00:05:18] Jenny: So I thought that was really great tool. So awesome. Okay. So let's jump right into it. I love talking about. Um, the love languages, lovely, which has been super impactful, um, through the workplace and my home life as well. I discovered the book, um, while my husband and I were separated, he actually bought it for me and then I read it.

[00:05:39] Jenny: And so how did you discover, uh, the love languages?

[00:05:44] David: So for me, you know, it's really, I love the idea of service. And, uh, so for me, family is so important, not only to give service, but also when someone does something unexpected back at you that you weren't anticipating. So I always kind of drive to the particular act. Avenue that says, how can I serve family, friends in professional life?

[00:06:10] David: How can I serve my clients in such a way that I make tying back to my time that I make it as easy as possible to deal with me because I'm mindful of how I'm consuming my time, but also consuming theirs. And I think when that avenue that has worked well for me professionally and personally, all throughout my career.

[00:06:31] Jenny: That's amazing. Thanks for sharing that as well. I think it's super important, important as well. And just acknowledging the time I was just on another podcast, we were talking about introverts and extroverts and how to use that time differently. And you know, the introverts, if they're going to give you their time, you want to make sure you're focused and you're present.

[00:06:48] Jenny: And that's literally like a way of servicing them as well. So thanks for sharing that with us. I really appreciate it. So, okay, so let's get right into it. We're going to be talking about. Spouse, and I would love for you to share, um, how many years you've been married. You said three decades, which is amazing.

[00:07:05] Jenny: So you don't need to tell us that cause you already did. Um, but how you have remained married for 30 years, how your wife and you work so closely together, how you serve each other and basically inspire us to become better spouses for our significant other.

[00:07:21] David: Well, thank you. And I love the concept of how you cover this, by the way, on your podcast, because we often overlook, you know, it's a focus on the individual. And I would not be where I'm at if it were today, if it wasn't for my wife, I just, just the amazing aspect that she has. We actually started out early on in our marriage.

[00:07:41] David: We are under this false notion that we kind of remain siloed. And what I mean by that is, Oh, it's just easy. I'll keep my bank account. You keep your bank account. Uh, you got your ways of doing things. I have my ways of doing things and it ended up being more difficult than what it should have been. And so really we were a couple of years in and she's like, let's just stop this.

[00:08:04] David: Let's just get everything together. Cause first of all, she hated the way I balanced my checkbook and managed my finances. And so we ended up. Putting that was like a step to say, okay, we really are, you know, with the marriage, it's two people become one. So what are you doing in the process of your marriage to be one?

[00:08:24] David: It doesn't mean you give up everything of your independence. It doesn't mean you can't do things on your own or independently, but I stopped now and say, what impact does this have on my wife, the actions I'm going to take. And we spend a ton of time now just. Planning. We walk one hour every morning, as long as it's not raining.

[00:08:48] David: And in that time, that's our time where we simply say, what are we doing? What have we done? What are we doing? And what do we want to do? And to me, it's just an amazing time that helps me plan out what's important to her, but also for me.

[00:09:02] Jenny: So David, I want to ask you, because I think it's amazing. You guys walk an hour. My husband and I try to do that every single day, but it doesn't always work out just because different schedules. And if the most, maybe it's 15 or 20 minutes. Did you always create that time throughout your whole marriage?

[00:09:17] Jenny: Are you just finding it the time now, later in life, or maybe because your careers are different, or maybe your age? Yeah. Are you always doing it? Talk to us about that.

[00:09:26] David: We were both working a lot through our career. There was time pausing. We, I have two kids grown now, obviously, but they, um, once we hit the point that they were older and then their lives were getting busy, we were finding, we didn't have time to talk anymore because it was just one thing after another.

[00:09:49] David: And I'm an early riser. She is not as much as I am, but she said, you know what? I'm going to start getting up early with you. And at the point I was jogging every day and I was battling injuries all the time. And so finally she said, how about we just slow it down and we walk together for a while. That became a habit.

[00:10:08] David: And now it's an integral part of what our lives are like.

[00:10:11] Jenny: I absolutely love that. I love the fact that you're having a lot of conversations. I feel like when you're walking, you're not really distracted by your phones. You're outside and my husband and I will talk about what we have coming up that day, what we want to do that weekend. So it does create a lot of conversation where you may not have it while you're making smoothies, making breakfast, passing each other, Thanks As well, so, and I think that it's super important to make the time for that.

[00:10:36] Jenny: I think so many couples find so many excuses or reasons why they can't create that time together. Um, so I think that's really impactful. I would encourage anyone listening today to do that. Um, so, okay, what are some other tools that you or tips that you would recommend for us? You know, that may be. Want to reach that 30 year mark

[00:10:55] David: So I, uh, started something. It was actually, uh, kind of a joke, but it has now grafted into, we both do it that particularly on birthdays. I started what I call birthday week and I just got small gifts. So seven days before her birthday, I mean, one was a spatula. That was the gift. We needed a spatula. So just so you know, it's nothing.

[00:11:18] David: It's, it's not a diamond one week, one day in the neck, but it was seven little gifts. And, uh, she posted it on social media the first time I did it. And, um, I was a hero, you know, I was a hero and I was, uh, every other husband was annoyed with me, like, what are you doing? But I found by just that those little gifts brought so much joy to her that we are very mindful.

[00:11:47] David: Now she does it for me. She's just kind of like, Hey, you know what? I have a lot of fun with this. I want to have a lot of fun with you because I enjoy doing it and trying to be creative. So I just think find those little moments when you can do something for your partner. That's unexpected as little as it could be.

[00:12:09] David: Um, it could be as little as I folded the laundry when she wasn't anticipating it, or I vacuumed the house when she didn't expect it. I think those little things go a long way in drawing you closer and making you more comfortable to want to talk about important things when they come up.

[00:12:28] Jenny: when I'm hearing you say is that you're considering your spouse, you're considering maybe the needs or things that need to be done around the house and they're unexpected where it's almost like you're being, um, you're hitting it before she asked you to do it or nags you about it as well. So that takes a lot of consideration and obviously, you know, that it needs to be done as well.

[00:12:48] Jenny: So why not chip in help? And I think a lot of times. Not that I was at laziness, but just some, one of the spouse was just fails to chip in and do things to where is the other one is nagging and that's where there's a little bit of a divide as well. So, um, my husband, he. Loves doing acts of service and he's always holding my laundry and doing things like that.

[00:13:07] Jenny: I need to be a better spouse and probably do more of that. So that's great that you were doing that when you said earlier about how you guys talk a lot and you're creating those conversations. Um, what would be some advice, like if they can't go and walk obviously, but are you creating more time to have those conversations without distractions?

[00:13:29] David: Yeah. And so particularly we, we work both work out of our homes. So, Her office is the wall behind me. And what we end up doing, particularly if we tell each other, here's some important events for the day. I've got a important client call. Uh, one of the things we'll do is we'll talk about this podcast afterwards, because after we're done with something formal, if we don't have something right afterwards, either one of us goes and proactively says, here's what happened in that, here's what I like, here's what I didn't like, or I was on this call, I got some questions for you.

[00:14:08] David: So there are those, and it's, it's structured, but not, it's an understanding that we're going to do it. Um, and it may not, everything may be fine, but it's those moments that right after something happens in your life that you get to share that you then either understand or you don't. Wow, I got advice. I could have done that better for the next time.

[00:14:27] David: Or you just get that lovely affirmation that says, good job. Love you for what you did there.

[00:14:34] Jenny: So David, I love what you're saying. And I want my husband and I to be able to work like that. However, when he gets done with a call and he comes to my office, I'm so deeply in thought or I've just got a podcast and he's like, so are you creating, like, I had to stop working in the kitchen because every time I was working in the kitchen, he'd always want to talk to me and I'm like, I'm working.

[00:14:52] Jenny: He's like, you need to be working in your office that way. I know I don't disturb you. So what would be some advice that you would have? So when I want to go talk to him or he wants to come talk to me, I can like check out and give them my full attention where I'm being respectful. Yes,

[00:15:06] David: that's where on your end, maybe you formalize flex times in your schedule. That you have nothing planned and potentially that time is spent dialoguing, talking to your husband. If not, and he's not available or you're not available, it's found time. You got whatever that 30 minutes. And then I think you declare, you find out what his is too.

[00:15:30] David: Like where's his flex times, try to get those aligned so that you can both meet in the middle at the same place, you know, outside each other's, uh, home or You at least say here is my time I'm available today. So whether I'm in the kitchen doing some follow up stuff, or I'm in my office, if you come at me outside those timeframes, I may not be able to be as fully engaged as I'd like to.

[00:15:58] David: So, and I think once you do that, you'll develop a cadence and an understanding through that. I think it's great. Your husband wants to share with you because. In, in my business, I'm not a marriage counselor, but I do deal with couples. And it's surprising to me still how many couples don't talk about the details in their lives.

[00:16:19] Jenny: 100%. Yeah. My husband always wants to talk and he works from home most of the time. I work a lot out of the house and there's days I work in the house. So like when I'm here, it's like, Oh my gosh, he has a friend. He has someone home with him. It's like a cohort. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, I have to stay focused.

[00:16:33] Jenny: But there was so many years where we didn't talk. And, or it was just me talking and he was just listening. So we're having more conversations. So what you're saying is communicate, have a conversation with your spouse. Cause that's going to unite you. And it's going to make sure that you guys are supporting each other.

[00:16:49] David: Yeah. And just be mindful of when those times need to happen so that you, you say, Hey, from two to four, I can't, I may not look like I'm quote doing anything, but I need to do some deep work during that time. So

[00:17:02] Jenny: Awesome. Well, speaking of some of these conversations to my husband will come and want to talk to me about something that's going on with work and I have learned that sometimes he wants me to be the solutions advisor, but other times he just wants to be. So, um, talk a little bit about not having to fix the spouse's problems and to be the solution advisor and how to support them in a different role.

[00:17:28] David: I was always, I actually. Was counseled and coached by my wife one time. I don't need you to solve every problem for me. And I think us as guys, that's our natural thing, a problem's in front of us. I need to solve it. So I learned now is listen and just ask questions. And she does the same thing. Or if I declare.

[00:17:51] David: I need a little advice here. Coach me through this. I just had a client call and I think it went horrible. I need, I need, what, what would you do? And then there are other times I just walk out there and declare, okay, I just need to get this off my chest and, and I don't need the problem solved. And she'll do the same thing.

[00:18:09] David: So it's just those declarative setting up the parameters. I'm why you're coming to your spouse, uh, is helpful too. Uh, because sometimes, uh, It's good just to shut up and not give advice and just listen.

[00:18:24] Jenny: Yeah. I've had to learn to do that very much recently as well, just because I, I want to help people and I always feel like there's always a different way of maybe attacking something or viewing it. And, um, you know, But my husband is just like, I don't want you to respond. I just want you to listen. So he is communicating his needs as well.

[00:18:44] Jenny: So, um, awesome. So let's talk a little bit about adapting to aging, adapting to each other's growth, whether it's in business or it's personally, or just aging, how you guys are adapting. Um,

[00:19:01] David: We seek right now, the key word for us is flexibility. I want as much flexibility as I can get in my life. My children, my, both my children are in their twenties, have actually taught me that both of them have done So much more personally in their time being alive than I ever did at their age. And when I started to look at them and say, how are you guys doing this?

[00:19:32] David: Like I've had my youngest son has hiked the Appalachian trail over 2000 miles. My oldest has spent three months in Alaska in the wilderness, just. You know, they've done all these crazy things. And that's because I put on myself this rigidness that I had to perform at my job, a particular way I had to, you know, default to work versus personal life.

[00:19:57] David: And so now my wife and I all it's all about flexibility. Sure. I've got the structure of a career and I love it, but I'm now paying more attention as I get older to weave in these personal things I've always wanted to do, and how can I do that so that. If I hit the point where I can finally get to do it and I'm not either physically or cognitively able, I've missed a wonderful opportunity.

[00:20:24] Jenny: Yeah, I'm going to send this to a couple of people that I know that could listen to what you just said. I think a lot of times, um, we're all stuck in like corporate America or we're like, like, I was just having this conversation with someone else where it's like, there's so much PTO, but they're so focused on having to be at their career, having to be where they don't take that time for themselves to go and travel.

[00:20:47] Jenny: And they've gotten to an age where their body can't hike the Appalachian trail, or they can't go and do an Alaskan cruise because of their stamina or now their joints don't hurt, or they ended up getting cancer and they never got to go and do all the things that they wanted to do because they were so rigid or non flexible or thinking they had to save all this money when actually they weren't actually living their life to the fullest.

[00:21:08] Jenny: So, um, I'm going to send what you just said as well to some of the people that I believe. I need to hear that as well. Um, and your kids are in your 20s. So are you going to hug the Appalachian trail? Are you going to Alaska anytime soon?

[00:21:19] David: My goal is it's on my bucket list. And that's another thing that I push people as they age is you can call it a bucket list, a vision list, whichever you need to list out all the aspirational goals as crazy as they are. Think about this. William Shatner went into space in his nineties. Okay. So think crazy things that you think I would never do, but I would like to do if I had the time and the resources.

[00:21:48] David: So one of mine is I have two that one is I want to hang glide. Still like I've always wanted to do that. And the second is I want to hike the Grand Canyon rim to rim. And that's, and we've been there twice. I've hiked parts of it. And so that one is on my goal for next year. Uh, my wife keeps saying you need to do the hang gliding sooner rather than later, they're a big guy, but, but.

[00:22:15] David: They're crazy aspirational goals. And when you put those on there, that gets your creative juices flowing to think about all kinds of other neat things that you can do in your life.

[00:22:24] Jenny: And I think it provides light at the end of the tunnel as well, where it's like, okay, I'm going to struggle the next three or four weeks or months. And I'm going to probably want to quit my job or things like that. But at the same time, then you know, you're going to be able to take a month off or you're going to be able to go and do this amazing thing as well.

[00:22:38] Jenny: Like my why is to travel. And that's why I work. And it's why I do all the things I do, because I want the flexibility and I want to be able to travel and enjoy this beautiful earth that we are on as well. And I want to go and explore it. And similar to your kids, my husband and I are doing way more in our.

[00:22:56] Jenny: Early 40s than our parents ever did in their lifetime as well, because, you know, we were brought up a little bit differently. And once again, we've seen our parents age where they're not able to do things at the age and now they're having a lot of regrets. So we're starting to do those things as well. Um, I was just going to make a recommendation about the Appalachian trail since you live in Jacksonville.

[00:23:16] Jenny: My mom lives in Delonica and that is the, um, amicola falls is the start of the 80. And last October, I decided to go hiking with her, which my mom is a hiker. She has the backpack. She has every little gadget you need to go hiking. And I didn't have anything, but what we did is we started, um, at the top of the falls and we hiked for several hours and we went to this place called Lynn foot in.

[00:23:46] Jenny: And you actually stay overnight. There's actually bunk beds, family style meals. You wake up the next morning, you have breakfast and then you hike up to, I think it's called Springer mountain. And then you come back as well. And you spend the night again and then you come back. So it's a nice little like two day hike, maybe three days.

[00:24:04] Jenny: And, um, I will highly recommend it. So if you want to do something that's, um, hiking related and with your son as well, he could. Uh, join you. I would highly recommend that. So

[00:24:14] David: thank you.

[00:24:15] Jenny: maybe add it to your list and look up Lenfoot in, you know, my mom kept saying, I got us a room and here I'm thinking there's going to be wine.

[00:24:22] Jenny: I'm going to have, you know, this wonderful experience. And literally it was like those wooden bunk beds. There's no wine. There's no alcohol whatsoever. But the food was really, really great. So anyways, I'm going to recommend that. So,

[00:24:35] David: I think that's awesome that your mom does that too, because so many times with aging personal care continues to be pushed off and pushed off. And just what she's doing there is going to pay so much dividends for her quality of life as she gets older. That's awesome.

[00:24:53] Jenny: She's always been active. And I think that's the major difference between my parents, my husband's parents as they retired and they didn't have any hobbies. They didn't continue being active and they're having a lot of health issues now. And we're going to Yellowstone in like a week or two. And I don't even know if they're going to be able to walk around.

[00:25:12] Jenny: Now, if I went with my mother, she would be out hiking me, doing everything as well. Um, so I want to encourage people to have hobbies as well and have hobbies with your spouses. My husband and I just went golfing and, you know, it's just really great quality time. We have a lot of fun, too, and it's kind of competitive and, um, you can make bets and things like that.

[00:25:31] Jenny: So, um, yeah, I play tennis, which is another really great sport for people that are aging as well for mobility purposes. So, um. If you were to fall, you wouldn't necessarily break a hip or things like that. You're able to get back up. Um, but anyways, you know, senior knowledge and care could be a whole nother episode.

[00:25:51] David: exactly. Yes.

[00:25:53] Jenny: So, um, anyways, awesome. Well, thanks for sharing so much about your spouse. We really appreciate the knowledge and that's amazing. Congratulations on 30 years and to many, many more. So. Let's talk about friends and family and how you, um, have such great relationships, why you have such great relationships and what you continue to do on a daily, weekly or monthly basis to let your friends know that you value them.

[00:26:19] Jenny: You care for them. They're important and you want them to be part of your life.

[00:26:22] David: Well, thank you. I've got, uh, for college high school friends. Who are, we text every day. Um, and they have been, they're, they're brothers. They're not friends. They're brothers. They're, they're kids. I, my kids, I'll call them uncles. Um, and to me that started because all the five of us together are really look at each other as I don't expect anything from them, but I know they're going to be there for me.

[00:26:54] David: For me, if I need it. And so they are close. In the sense that I can call and talk to them about anything. They call and talk to me about anything. And that, that has nurtured over the years because there, there could have been two or three years where we didn't talk to each other, you know, one of the guys was in the Navy.

[00:27:16] David: And so that's very important to me. Those, those foundational four friends. Um, I really rely on them for a lot of things, particularly related to. Career decisions that I might make because it's so important to, in that respect, family for me, uh, we are dedicated. My wife and I, particularly as it relates to our kids, we want to see them at least three times a year.

[00:27:42] David: And we will, if it means we have to go to them three times, I, we don't put any limits or, or. Criteria around, you have to come see us twice and we'll come see you once we are going to go, uh, make it as easy as possible not to disrupt their lives, but we want to go see them and then it relates to family. I wish I could say every one of my family relationships was amazing and great.

[00:28:10] David: Some I struggle with, but I have put it in my mind that I don't care. I'm going to pour myself out into that relationship because it's family. Um, even if I don't get anything back, you know, I don't have any destructive relationships. There's nobody who's trying to take advantage of me. I really am. I don't want to put any criteria on that because it's kind of like their family.

[00:28:33] David: I want to be there for them and we'll just take the relationship where it's at.

[00:28:38] Jenny: Awesome. So what I'm hearing you say is that you're being realistic with your expectations. You're not expecting anyone to do anything that you're available. You're encouraged. You still reach out, even if they don't really reach out to you because you're wanting to know that they're there and. You're not wanting to create some kind of inconvenience or pressure on them as well, because I think that's what the pressure is, you know, I feel like sometimes there's like a lot of pressure.

[00:29:03] Jenny: My mom obviously go up there. She made me feel guilty about certain things as well. And then it's like, oh, it's like, I'm not as flexible as I want to be. But I also think just being realistic with the expectations, because I think sometimes we have too high expectations or just certain expectations.

[00:29:17] Jenny: People are always going to disappoint us. As well to where we don't feel like they want to be with us, or, you know, is it worth the effort to go and be with them as well? Um, so when you talk about your four friends from high school. I have a lot of high school friends as well, but some of the individuals that may be listening may have lost touch with their friends in high school, or maybe they didn't have a group of people.

[00:29:39] Jenny: They met in college and maybe they didn't really meet people within the workplace to really hang out with if they are lacking that friendship and that community. Do you have places that you would encourage them to go to meet people to where they can have a sense of friendship?

[00:29:57] David: Yeah, I think for me, uh, my faith is important role in my life and so I garner and have gotten and have long term relationships simply through my activities through church. If that's not your type of thing, then I, any type of community service. Organizations are great ways to meet people. If you're rotary is a, is a wonderful organization.

[00:30:22] David: I speak a lot in front of rotary groups, but any other community organizations. And the reason why is you find you naturally find people who are there because they want to serve. Whatever way, whether it's even out of personal or selfish motivations, they're still there to serve. And I think you can find people there that probably align close to your values.

[00:30:44] David: So that's what I would, and let it happen organically. You know, don't go there saying I need a friend, just go there, participate in those types of situations. And I. I've had good long term quality relationships as a result.

[00:30:59] Jenny: Yeah, I definitely want to second what you're saying, especially with the volunteering as well, like, find something that you're passionate about, or that you like, like, those cats, or if it's dogs, or whether it's gardening, or whether it's cooking, I mean, whether it's all face food bank, or it's like a garden center near you as well, because you'll find Be surrounded by like minded individuals that are passionate about the same things.

[00:31:21] Jenny: And what's so cool is that people are there and I feel like they let their guard down a little bit, or they're a little bit more vulnerable and they're a little bit more open to having conversations because they're in a sense of where place they feel confident and maybe versus just like going to a meetup or.

[00:31:35] Jenny: You know, going somewhere else. So I've always found volunteering provides a lot of benefits to me personally, emotionally as well. Um, physically, but friendship has always come out of it. And I've actually gotten a career or 2 from volunteering as well. So I want to encourage people to go in and volunteer.

[00:31:52] Jenny: So when you think about your friends and how you had said earlier about how you, um, They obviously guys talk a lot, but they'll always be there for you. Why do you think that is like, what, what is it about your relationship or what have you done in the past or what have they done as well? So that you know, that there'll be there.

[00:32:11] Jenny: You can trust that and their loyalty.

[00:32:14] David: Yeah. I think first of all, shared experiences in, in high school, you know, we did plenty of stupid stuff, so you have, we have a lot of fun memories to, to. Pull on, but then also in each of our lives, there have been family situations that have come up. For example, I relied heavily on them. One of my children attempted suicide.

[00:32:36] David: And during that timeframe, I can't think of what it would have been like. To not have them there. I probably would have adjusted in some way, but it was all of, and it was the right amount of balance. So it wasn't overbearing. It wasn't the solve your problem type attitude that Dave, let's, let's see what we can do to solve that for you.

[00:32:57] David: Uh, what I have found over the years is we all have become really good listeners. And so when they call. I want to tell you about this situation and I'll know whether or not they're looking for my advice or not, or just a friendly here. So for me, it's great sounding boards to together for each of us, but it's also a safe.

[00:33:20] David: And trusting place to share of yourself, um, eat outside of your spouse. I mean, that's what I have with my spouse, but I could share anything with these guys and they're not going to tell me what I want to hear. They're going to tell me their best view of what might help me.

[00:33:40] Jenny: So what I, well, while I'm listening to you, I'm thinking about my husband. I'm also thinking about some of the men that work with my organization as well. And many of them struggle with opening up and being honest and sharing personal information or. Just, you know, just connecting with them or creating time to connect with other as well.

[00:34:00] Jenny: So if there is someone that's struggling with opening up to other men, what would be, how would you encourage them to open up and start the conversation versus keeping it all in and not being open with them?

[00:34:13] David: So I think as you, uh, I would say do an audit of your friendships in essence. And kind of say, who are people that, again, I'm going to invest time in not necessarily expecting anything in return, but because I'm thinking, wow, I could learn from that person, or I could benefit from this relationship, this friendship.

[00:34:38] David: With them. And then again, it's not about, I just not a five step process. Do these five things and you got a great friend, you let it happen organically. And I think as you build up that level of trust, you can start with small things to say, I'm struggling with the behavior aspect of one of my kids.

[00:34:55] David: You've got three kids. How do you do that? And I think that you'll find is you begin to share things back and forth. They're going to say. Well, I don't have all the answers. What do you do? You know, and it, it happens organically. It happens over time, but you have to be dedicated to say, I'm going to cultivate, cultivate this relationship.

[00:35:17] David: Um, and again, it doesn't, you don't have to feel needy or pushy, but it's simply, I'm going to invest the time to make this, try to try to make this work.

[00:35:26] Jenny: So when you say investing the time to, I think a lot of times, and this was speaking for my husband, speaking for people that work for my organization, they don't create time to connect with. Other men or with their friends, um, you know, they assume other people are busy. They assume people don't want to hang out with them, or they assume they don't have time or, you know, oh, they're not going to want to go do that.

[00:35:47] Jenny: So what would be some words of encouragement that you would have for these individuals that are maybe just sitting on the fence, waiting for somebody else to call them, not necessarily making the first move?

[00:35:57] David: And again, I would look at The value that the, you feel the relationship is going to bring you. And that may sound selfish, but it's, it's not, I mean, we all want to derive something from each other. So I would, I would first of all say, look at the individuals, your groups that are around you. But I'd also ask you to consider this.

[00:36:20] David: If you are at work, relationships can be very tight. When there's work, that's where I counsel. And I even seen it on myself to say, be mindful that a work relationship can end very quickly if either one of you leaves the organization. And I try to tell people, particularly those who are older to say, if all of your close relationships are only work related, you're at risk because.

[00:36:48] David: At least 50 percent of your social network disappears when you leave your job, if you choose to say, retire or go do something different. So the idea is if it's a work relationship, you've got to figure out ways to get to know them better and have them get to know you. So they're personally invested in your personal life outside of that.

[00:37:09] David: Then it is investing time either through. about volunteer organizations or other avenues where you're around people who share your values, your ideas, and maybe like minded in some of the things that Are common that draw you together.

[00:37:27] Jenny: Yeah, I, I totally agree with what you're saying. I think friendships are so important and I think to, I think it's important for women to have girlfriends and go and spend time with girlfriends just as important it is for men to go and spend time with men as well. I was reading a book, um, becoming your spouse's better half, which is a great book for anyone that's married and it breaks down the benefits of men having that time together and women as well, where they're outside of the household, they're outside connecting, they're learning from other people.

[00:37:53] Jenny: They're being inspired. Inspired by their friends are having really great dialogue as well. And it's almost like a stimulator and a refresher for the individual as well. So when they do come back into the home, they're just, you know, I think a better human for themselves and for their families too. So, um, I want to encourage men and women to go and find some friends.

[00:38:12] Jenny: Spend time with them and, and don't just look for friends when your life has gone to shit and you need somebody as well, because I think that's the wrong time to find friends. Because then you have this level of expectation of those individuals. And I know when I was going through a lot with my husband.

[00:38:28] Jenny: I had a close knit of girlfriends that I knew I could count on. I could reach out to where I knew they wouldn't judge me, judge him. They wouldn't hold anything against him long term. If I did decide to stay, they would be supportive. And I think it's really, really important to have those people in your corner before something tragic or bad happens in your life as well.

[00:38:47] David: Yeah. I think you need to be mindful of, are you going to do put undue pressure? So if you're going to say, I want to have something to unburden to somebody else, you have to think before you unburden yourself of that is, is that going to put too much pressure on them? Is that going to strain the relationship?

[00:39:04] David: Or is it going to be one that says they're ready for it? Because you've got enough closeness there that they're like, ah, I want to be there to help.

[00:39:13] Jenny: 100 percent awesome. Well, I want to dive right into yourself and I really want you to share with our listeners how you, you know, stroke yourself, how you empower yourself, how you make yourself feel incredible every single day so that you can go out and do all the things that you want to do and go and coach clients.

[00:39:29] Jenny: You can be a great husband. You can be a great father. I think a lot of times we get into a state of serving everybody else and forget to serve ourselves. And I think the better you are, the better your organization can be, the better your family can be, your household and all those things. And I know that you spend a lot of time in self care, which makes you a better person for yourself as well.

[00:39:50] Jenny: So definitely inspire us to take ownership of our health and our life so that we can be the best version of ourselves.

[00:39:58] David: Well, thank you. And I, first and foremost, and I'm going to go back to time. Um, you have to put some structure in your life. So for me and people, people, I have some people say you're nuts, but I plan every hour of my awake time, two weeks out. And, but it's not perfect. It always changes. I do that to tell myself that I am ready to try to use my time to the best of my ability.

[00:40:33] David: And I still waste a lot of time and all that stuff, but it's there and it challenges me. So that inspires me to be able to continue to say how and how well am I using my time? And when. Should I adjust that time to either be present for myself or others? What's included in that time is the personal care element.

[00:40:56] David: That is where I walk. Uh, I try to do right now I'm averaging 11, 000 steps a day. And so I really try to push the morning walk, but then I'm also dedicated to take my dog out for a walk a couple of times a day for additionally that I also take. Breaks during the day to just start in the morning and to go until the end of your work day without stopping.

[00:41:24] David: And stepping away from all screens and doing something different, uh, whether it's talking to your spouse, going outside for just a little while, re energizes the brain, re energizes the body to get me back to being more focused in what I'm doing. So in all those elements and, and I weave that time, it's also then reflecting on how well did I do on my planning?

[00:41:50] David: And challenging myself, where can I get better? So it's a continuous cycle of self improvement, trying to reach perfection, knowing I never will, but knowing the journey is worth the time.

[00:42:02] Jenny: I love everything that you're saying, and I want to basically second the planning and putting your schedule there as well. Um, you know, when I was going through a hard time, you know, I got, I needed to take ownership of my time and start caring for myself because I basically gave my entire life to my company.

[00:42:18] Jenny: And I was. Drowning in it. And it was about to fail. And like, it seems like the more I gave the company, the more it failed. And I literally had to take a step back and a mentor told me, they said, you have to take care of yourself first. And he says, for the first three hours of you being awake, I want you to only do things that serve you.

[00:42:34] Jenny: And that can be personal care, things like that. So, and because I was dealing with everything with the marriage, I had to create that time to have connection with my husband. So Same thing, my schedule was like 636 to 630 snuggle time that way I gave my husband a little bit of attention to personal touch and then I would, you know, I would, I would do yoga or stretch and then it was like working on then going and playing tennis and then I would work on.

[00:43:00] Jenny: Like priority items for my company before actually going into the office to where I was serving my agenda and what I needed to do. And I did that for the first, like, 3, 3 and a half hours of every single day there was life changing because of what was happening prior is I would just get up. Roll over, get dressed, see you later, grab the coffee, go to work.

[00:43:21] Jenny: And I would do what you're talking about all day. And, um, it was really, really impactful. And then scheduling those breaks too. And I insist my team members take a 30 minute, not a 60 minute break every single day, remember being in corporate. And if you went out to lunch, you were, it was frowned on. And you're like, I'm getting paid for lunch, but I'm staying for lunch. So, you know, I think it's super important and I love that you make a plan and I, I know that, um, having a plan is one thing, but for me, putting it on my calendar in my own, it also reminded me to go and do those things. So I was a very important. Appointment on my calendar where I could see it, or if I was doing something else, I'm gonna get the calendar reminder, like in 15 minutes, you need to go work out or in 15 minutes, you need to go do that.

[00:44:12] Jenny: It created really great habits and habits that I still utilize today, you know, several years later. So I love all of that. When you're saying you're getting 11, 000 steps in, I think that's amazing. I want to know how you're doing that so that I can get up to that because I want to walk 11, 000 steps per day.

[00:44:29] David: So the first part is we walk. About four miles in the morning. So that's, that's part of our routine that gives us about an hour and 10, 15 minutes of what we call our quality time. And then twice during the day, I take the dog back out. We've got a hyper, uh, golden doodle. And so she gets walked and I walk her about another mile to a mile and a half twice a day.

[00:44:54] David: And that will usually get me between 11 steps. But then on the weekends. Particularly on Saturdays, I go, I do eight miles. So I do an eight mile walk. That is, that is my personal development time too. So I'll listen to a lot of podcasts during that timeframe to try to nurture and do some self development during that timeframe as well.

[00:45:16] David: Uh, and, but that also helps get my averages up over.

[00:45:20] Jenny: Yeah, I think that's amazing. So the fact that you're doing all these things for yourself and the walking the steps, can you share with our listeners some of the amazing benefits that this has had on your life that would inspire them to take note and maybe start doing some of these things for themselves every morning?

[00:45:37] David: So for my age group, I'm going to throw out there. I'm 60 years old. And at my age group, I am, uh, my BMI is below average for my age group. So my body mass index is right where it needs to be. My weight is right where it needs to be. Um, my blood pressure is lower than what it actually needs to be. My heart rate's great.

[00:45:59] David: Um, went to my last physical and the doctor was done with me in 10 minutes. And he said, um, all right, normally I like to have, I don't like to lead off with. of my non problem patient for the day, but congratulations, you are my one non problem patient. So for me, it brings so many other net benefits. Uh, I just hiked, uh, three days ago with my son, my youngest, who did the Appalachian trail.

[00:46:25] David: We were coming up a hill and I'm gabbing away. And he looked at me and he said, old man, look at you. We're walking up the hill and you're talking and you're not breathing heavy. That was a compliment to me.

[00:46:35] Jenny: That's amazing. That's amazing. My mom wants me to go hiking and do Blood Mountain, so I don't, I'm sure your son can tell you all about Blood Mountain. I'm possibly going to, I'm going to possibly attempt it when I go up there for Thanksgiving. So we, we will see for sure. Um, yeah, I think once you focus on your health and you are being active, I think there's so many benefits, you know, I'm sure that, You're probably not on a lot of prescription drugs based on like everything that you're seeing, which, you know, other individuals that are way younger than you are dealing with obesity or they're having diabetes and they're on all of these different medications.

[00:47:12] Jenny: And so I think it's absolutely amazing what you're doing and kudos to you. And I appreciate all the knowledge that you've had to share today. Um, when you think about your life and you think about what you're doing today, what is the thing that you're most proud of?

[00:47:28] David: Oh, wow. I am most proud of, I think, first of all, uh, my family, my, my wife and my two kids. I just have to, because I am not who I am, were it not for them. And I'm not proud because of anything that I did, so to speak. I'm proud of who they are as people and how much they bring so much joy and value to my life.

[00:47:57] Jenny: That's amazing. Love them. And for all of our listeners today, if there was one piece of advice that you could give them that they could implement in their life today or tomorrow, that would change their mindset, change their life for a better future and where it would inspire them to design their life.

[00:48:13] Jenny: What would it be?

[00:48:15] David: I would highly encourage everyone to put a factor of patience in their life. What I mean by that is if you have something that's really important that you have to get done, figure out the time that it's going to take you and then add 50 percent onto it because anything that's really good in our lives usually takes longer than anticipated.

[00:48:38] David: If you get it done in the initial time, great, found time, but otherwise plan it a little bit longer than you think. And it'll take some of the frustration out

[00:48:46] Jenny: And budgeted double budget, double the money as well.

[00:48:51] David: that yes, there you go. Yes.

[00:48:53] Jenny: I just did an expansion. I own a music school. We just did a $10,000 renovation and expansion and I was like, oh yeah, like a hundred thousand. I'll be able to get it done like $200,000 later. I'm like, ugh. Um, we did get it done in the amount of time that we wanted to get it done.

[00:49:06] Jenny: It just cost us double the amount. So anyways. That's a whole nother podcast.

[00:49:10] David: Great ad, great ad to that.

[00:49:14] Jenny: so anyways, David, it's been absolutely amazing having this wonderful conversation with you. I really appreciate your approach to life and just your philosophy as well. Uh, if our listeners want to connect with you, where can they connect with you?

[00:49:27] Jenny: Do you have any events? Do you have any programs? Do you have any free downloads? Tell us all the goods.

[00:49:34] David: Sure. So just go to infinity lifestyle design. com again, infinity lifestyle design. com. On the front page, you can go a variety of different directions. You can go download chapter one of my book, the time optimized life. So you can get an idea of what is this proactive approach to time look like. Then a little further down on the front page, there's two assessments that you can take.

[00:49:56] David: That are free. One is the time management analysis. Those are for people who are in career. Want to try to figure out where are my opportunities to improve my time? And then if you're closer towards retirement, want to get an idea of what time might look like, what your life could see there, then you can take the retirement time analysis.

[00:50:14] David: Both of those links are on the front page and just take those and you'll get your free assessment,

[00:50:19] Jenny: I love it. I'm gonna be sending a link to my team right after we get this. I'm gonna drop it in slack about the time management. Because like I said earlier, you know, so many times we feel so busy and we feel so overwhelmed. And it's just because we're not utilizing our time wisely. And instead of delegating, we're trying to take on so many things we want control.

[00:50:38] Jenny: And then, like I said, a lot of people just want to handle a lot of the easy tasks and just get those check marks, but doesn't necessarily meet the goals or move the organization further. Okay. And yeah, it's all about working smart as well. So I really appreciate all of the knowledge that you shared today.

[00:50:53] Jenny: So thank you again for all of our listeners. Thanks for tuning in once again, go follow David. Uh, he's got some great resources for you. If you can think of five friends that would benefit from hearing today's podcast, I want to encourage you to send this podcast to five people. Always think about giving us a review.

[00:51:10] Jenny: We look forward to having you on the next podcast, wishing you a great day. It's your life. Take ownership, make the changes. You can do it.